Farewell - Acts 20:18-30

Back in Ephesus after traveling around the area preaching for some time, Paul gathers the “elders” together to speak to them before leaving again. He tells the people that he tried to make his ministry there about “serving the Lord with all humility of mind, and with many tears, and temptations, which befell me by the lying in wait of the Jews.” I’m not exactly sure what that last part means but he’s talking about the emotional investment that he made in the people of Ephesus. He promises them that he “kept nothing that was profitable unto you, but have shewed you, and have taught you publickly, and from house to house, Testifying both to the Jews and also to the Greeks, repentance toward God, and faith toward our Lord Jesus Christ.”

The Spirit is telling him to go to Jerusalem “not knowing the things that shall befall me there.” This is cross referenced with 1 Nephi 4:6 when Nephi is going again the third time to get the plates and says, “and I was led by the Spirit, not knowing beforehand the things which I should do.” Both men ultimately end up just doing what they are instructed to do by the Spirit, without concern for their own life, with Paul specifically “so that I might finish my course with joy, and the ministry, which I have received of the Lord Jesus, to testify the gospel of the grace of God.” It’s interesting how your focus shifts when your goal in life changes from “be comfortable” to “do God’s will.”
Here comes the bomb shell, Paul says, “and now, behold, I know that ye all, among whom I have gone preaching the kingdom of God, shall see my face no more.” The people must have been very surprised and saddened by this. First off, how would he know? The same Holy Spirit instructing Paul to go to Jerusalem told him that he would not be returning to Ephesus in his mortal lifetime. Even though it might have been difficult information to take, this knowledge probably brought closure for not only the people of the city but also for Paul himself. Sometimes information like this can help us move on, and even increase our faith as we accept God’s will and determine to be obedient even if it is difficult for us.
The IM says, “Paul’s words in Acts 20:22-26 are reminiscent of similar worlds spoken by the Prophet Joseph Smith shortly before his Martyrdom: ‘I am going like a lamb to the slaughter; but I am calm as a summer’s morning; I have conscience void of offense towards God, and towards all men.” It seems that Paul is able to have the same feeling of peace and resolution because he tells the people “wherefore I take you to record this day, that I am pure from the blood of all men. For I have not shunned to declare unto you all the counsel of God.” When receiving information like Paul and Joseph Smith did, it causes one to take time for personal reflection, and truly the power is when you can stare death in the face and feel ok with it.
Since he’s not coming back, he begins to instruct the elders on how to care for the church in his absence, which is “to feed the church of God” because “grievous wolves enter in among you, not sparing the flock. Also of your own selves shall men arise, speaking perverse things, to draw away disciples after them.” He’s warning them of both internal disputes and external exploitation that will destroy the church. The IM says, “Knowing of the Apostasy that would soon begin among the Ephesian Saints, Paul admonished Church leaders to ‘feed the church of God.’ One of the most important ways Church leaders do this is by nourishing members with the ‘good word of God.’ To be nourished by the word of God is one of the greatest protections against apostasy.
“Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles expressed how Church members seek spiritual nourishment today: ‘Most people don’t come to church looking merely for a few new gospel facts or to see old friends, though all of that is important. They come seeking a spiritual experience. They want peace. They want their faith fortified and their hope renewed. They want, in short, to be nourished by the good word of God, to be strengthened by the powers of heaven. Those of us who are called upon to speak or teach or lead have an obligation to help provide that, as best we possibly can.’”
Apostasy is best protected against by building personal testimony, having personal spiritual experiences to draw on, and constant vigilance. We can’t just have one confirmation of the truthfulness of the gospel, and then live the rest of our lives with that knowledge. It’s weird because if we think about knowledge that we acquire about any other subject, it’s sometimes a “learn once and you’re done” kind of thing, but I guess that’s not always the case. Take medicine for instance, that knowledge is constantly changing and you have to adapt and learn and improve, and the goal is always going to be patient care. Spiritually, the goal will always be a positive relationship with God and the information and procedures change as we become more educated and Christ-like.